State of the Bear

[commodorified]

So I feel like The Very Worst Everything, lately.

On the bright side, it's only taken me, what, three months this time to realise that maybe if I, I dunno, tell people what's going on, that might help?

So I'm having more health problems. For which I have many doctor's appointments, do not be alarmed. It is, however, time-consuming and incredibly boring.

The two that are messing with my ability to be there and be reliable for people the most are, I'm persistently seeing double and spending a lot of time wearing an eye patch, (for which I have seen a neurologist and am getting an MRI, also have an appointment with an opthamologist *and* a neuro-opthamologist, ooh fancy).

It did mean I ended up dressing as Nick Fury for Hallowe'en, though. :-)

And I'm having Epic Exhaustion, for which we're testing my thyroid (as well as everything else), and while I am aware that The Internet Does Not Have a Licence to Practice Medicine, I will not be at ALL surprised if that proves to be it, what with the whole epic sleep events, paper-dry skin, perpetually being cold, ability to gain weight while mostly uninterested in food, etc.

I have not turned into whatserface from the Lord Peter story, I just feel like her.

The bursitis is... well, actually it's an unstable sacroiliac, and it's getting better, slowly. Too slowly for my tastes. I would really really like to stop taking opiates. They're much less fun than popular literature suggests. I am getting an SI belt, yay. KT tape is awesome when it stays put, which it does NOT do when deployed along one's waistband-line.

Somehow in the midst of all of this I am managing to help Unfuck the Habitat, though I am much less help than I'd like to be, which is making family life a lot better, and I'm managing to do roller derby, though I miss more practices than I'd like. I'm even trying to make it to, if not the gym, the pool once or twice a week so I can do physio in the hot tub, which is actually really productive. I need to get out walking more, which being cold and tired all the time is rotten for, as is not being able to see properly and feeling vulnerable as Hell in an eye patch.

I got to actually skate up and shadow the refs Tuesday, and MAN do I need to work on my speed and my turns. But I made it through the scrimmage, and I can see the road to where I need to be, and I feel like I'll get there by the start of the season.

But I'm shaky, and unreliable, and kind of curled up inside myself, and sleeping too much and at all the wrong times. It's boring and crazy-making and thank GOD I have spouses who are willing to haul my dippy ass to the appointments I need to make it to in order to get this under control and get my life back.

So if I've neglected you, or flaked out on you, please nudge me. It's not you. It really, really is me.

Comments

[fajrdrako]

So - want to meet for coffee? Go for a gentle walk?

[commodorified]

I really really do! Only I might have to call you at the last minute and say OMG I AM AWAKE CAN HAZ COFFEE PLZ?

[fajrdrako]

Sure! Just call when you want to. Can't promise I'll be available, but my schedule these days is adaptable. So... Call me!

[umadoshi]

That's brutal. :/ I hope the tests come back with helpful results.

[redbird]

Supportive partners are a very good thing. I hope you and the medical people can get this under control soon.

[xinef]

{hugs} Thinking of you.

[graydon]

I hope it all gets better soon.

Unfortunately, metabolic medical stuff tends to get better at this infuriatingly measured pace, instead.

But may it at least get better!

[commodorified]

I am prepared to accept this as an improvement over slow and stately decline.

[lexin]

I'm sorry to year you're poorly. I hope they find out what it all is soon, and are able to do something about it.

[oursin]

Best wishes for getting this fixed.
Re opiates - heard fascinating lecture once on narcotics and painkillers and how the Fun Side-Effects were increasing seen as a Bad Thing rather than A Feature once you started getting non-opiate painkillers or just the particular effective agent rather than the whole poppy, and a whole lot of puritanism around the entire topic. (I wonder when docs stopped having their own laughing-gas parties?)

[toft]

Ugh, I'm sorry you're having frustrating and lingering health problems! Best of luck getting them sorted. <3

[mmegaera]

Much sympathy on the health problems, and empathy on the seeing double. My eyesight is such (one eye about twice as myopic as the other one, with added astigmatism) that the first time my current eye doctor examined me, he was rather astonished that I don't see double all the time. I do when I'm tired, but apparently compensating is something you have to have a lifelong habit of to accomplish.

Anyway, I hope things level out and start improving soonest.

[raincitygirl]

I'm very sorry to hear you've been ill. Although your Nick Fury Halloween costume sounds awesome.

[sergebroom]

"...I ended up dressing as Nick Fury for Hallowe'en..."

Channeling your inner Samuel L Jackson?
My best wishes.

[giglet]

*hugs*

I'm sorry that this is happening to you. Am sending you virtual Internet spoons.

[james_g4clf]

So sorry to hear you're so down - virtual hugs and prayers coming your way.

Get well SOON. Don't argue - just do as you're told.

It's Guy Fawkes Day - since you can't be on our beach for the fusillade of fireworks that I'm planning (followed by sausage casserole and mulled wine indoors where it'll be warmer), I'm sending a virtual barrage towards Ottawa. Please watch it in your mind's eye.

[gale_storm]

This is not a nudge in any way, shape or form, but man, oh man, that sounds like a bit of a mess that your brain is doing on you. Here's hoping that it all gets sorted quickly and painlessly.