commodorified: very worried stuffed crocodile clutching a pillow (not coping)
[personal profile] commodorified
Wiscon was great, and I feel like the panels I did went well and were worthwhile, although 5 panels over 2 days left me feeling like I didn't get to really get immersed; I didn't go to anything I wasn't on, there were several people I hugged but didn't get to talk to, and I was so incredibly tired the whole weekend and my throat hurt like hell and I kept waking up coughing, which I attributed to my lingering cold. Somehow I managed to magically overlook that I was sufficiently over said cold to have spent the weekend before hiking, including walking to the top of Dome Rock.

So then I said goodbye to everyone, packed my stuff, went to Benet's, and crashed.

... And woke up coughing and retching four times in the night, despite glugging down some antihistamine and cough syrup when it started.

I'm allergic to mold. Viciously. And Madison, being on two lakes plus whatever else goes into these things, has a thundering black mold problem.

The last couple of times I've been to Madison have been okay, one being WisCon 36 which was warm and dry and the other being October, but after Wiscon 35 I had the horrible awful allergies of doom and eventually changed my ticket and left early after coughing so hard I badly strained a rib. Which is incredibly painful, btw, and having done it once I'd do almost anything not to do it twice.

So I kind of freaked out.

So then I texted Cat and she came and got me and we went to breakfast and then to Nelle and Izzy's so I could nap on the sofa surrounded by air purifiers, and I got worse, and started having actual trouble breathing, and so Cat called Aeroplan and changed our tickets so I could go home the next day and she could stay an extra day to escort me.

And I cried a lot, which was ill-advised, but. And we went for supper with Benet so I could at least say goodbye and the pizza place was full of spores and we finished our pizza and Cat noticed that my lips were turning kind of white and we went to urgent care, where they put me on a nebuliser and gave me a prednisone scrip and an inhaler and I went back to Nelle and Izzy's and lay miserably propped up on the sofa until Cat got us packed and we headed for the airport.

And Chicago had a ground-stop on and we were delayed a bunch leaving and the Dane county regional airport has carpets. Which have spores. So I was back to shallow panting and trying hard not to think about how this would be going if I weren't prednisoned and albuteroled to the gills, because when your lips are already a fetching shade of white around the edges is not the time for panic attacks.

Apparently it was for a VIP, the pilot said Air Force One. I must really like Obama. That extra ninety minutes sitting over a rug full of death was unutterably awful, but I forgives.

So we got into, and eventually out of, Chicago, and my Favourite Ex came and picked us up and we had pho and I came home and crashed hard, but not as hard as Cat, who is now and forever my superhero.

Seriously people, she spent 36 hours basically making sure I kept breathing. She made me let her spend the money to change both tickets. She kept Ian and Rayne and Andrew updated. She made me go to urgent care and didn't give me shit when I did that Canadian thing about how I couldn't pay out of pocket for medical care it would ruin us and never be reimbursed and just get me home I'll go to the clinic and she got my stuff from Benet's and did all the packing and bear-led me home and sympathised with me when I bitched about the prednisone and held my hand when I felt like I might die and now that I can spare the energy to notice I begin to realise how fucking awful this has been for her. Please send her ALL the love ever in comments. She is my Captain Marvel forever.

Other awesome people: Nelle, Izzy, Benet, Ian (by phone from Toronto where he's working his ass off at CUPE50), Gibbs.

So now I'm home, and I'm on all the meds, and I'm still not breathing right. Plus my chest and face are full of crap, but hey, now I feel like I have pleurisy, instead of like I'm being smothered.

It sucks, but I'll take it.

I don't know what my future holds wrt Wiscon. I was semi-ok in the hotel this time, but this keeps getting worse; I'm not acclimating, I'm getting more sensitive.
I don't know what I'm going to do about the fact that people I love very much live in Madison, either. There must be some safe period to visit in. Maybe.

I'm not thinking about it right now. I'm not thinking about much. All I'm really thinking about is breathing.
Later, I might ask for advice. Right now, I don't think I can deal with it.

Yes, I have totally utterly quit smoking again. Horrible junkie that I am, even I can recognise the line between 'this might kill you someday' and 'this might kill you some day this week' is crossed.

It was a wonderful WisCon. It was worth everything. Later, I want to do some panel writeups, but right now all I can do is lie here and breathe, and watch Cat sleep.

ETA and then things went a bit South again and we went to the walk-in. So now I'm also on Advair and have instructions not to do things. FML. I'll just sit here and pant, then, shall I?
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Date: 2013-05-30 08:22 pm (UTC)
princessofgeeks: (CassieNotAlone by Paian)
From: [personal profile] princessofgeeks
Sending you good thoughts.

Date: 2013-05-30 08:34 pm (UTC)
redbird: tea being poured into a cup (cup of tea)
From: [personal profile] redbird
I wonder whether, if you come back to Wiscon, staying somewhere other than at the Concourse would make sense. I have no idea if any of the overflow hotels would be better, though.

Date: 2013-05-30 08:36 pm (UTC)
sparkymonster: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sparkymonster
Holy fucking shit ball monkeys. Please continue breathing and so much love to Cat. Fuck.

Date: 2013-05-30 08:41 pm (UTC)
ellen_fremedon: overlapping pages from Beowulf manuscript, one with a large rubric, on a maroon ground (Default)
From: [personal profile] ellen_fremedon
Oh, you poor thing. Your poor lungs. I hope you recover quickly and fully.

Date: 2013-05-30 09:06 pm (UTC)
kalmn: (Default)
From: [personal profile] kalmn
No dying. *hug*

Date: 2013-05-30 09:08 pm (UTC)
diaspora: (Default)
From: [personal profile] diaspora
*HUG* Much love to you, Cat, and all. It sounds like a horrible time. I'm glad you're past the worst. I remember prednisone--both the good and the bad of it.

Date: 2013-05-30 09:15 pm (UTC)
mme_hardy: White rose (Default)
From: [personal profile] mme_hardy
I am so sorry. This is absolutely awful. I'm glad you're alive!

Date: 2013-05-30 09:20 pm (UTC)
fajrdrako: Chris Hemsworth - Thor: The Dark World (Default)
From: [personal profile] fajrdrako
I'm glad you're back, and alive. Sorry to hear how sick you were. Are. Let me know when you feel well enough to meet for coffee. I can come over to the Bridgehead on Anderson.

Of course Cat is a superhero. I knew that. She is also a Marvel.

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From: [personal profile] fajrdrako - Date: 2013-05-30 09:55 pm (UTC) - Expand

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From: [personal profile] fajrdrako - Date: 2013-05-30 09:56 pm (UTC) - Expand

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From: [personal profile] fajrdrako - Date: 2013-05-31 06:35 pm (UTC) - Expand

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From: [personal profile] fajrdrako - Date: 2013-06-01 12:58 pm (UTC) - Expand
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Date: 2013-05-31 12:25 am (UTC)
fairestcat: Dreadful the cat (Default)
From: [personal profile] fairestcat
Later, I might ask for advice. Right now, I don't think I can deal with it.

Don't go back to Madison is both advice and pretty much the last thing Marna, who loves dearly a number of people who live there, needs to be told right now.

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] graydon - Date: 2013-05-31 12:36 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2013-05-30 11:46 pm (UTC)
j00j: rainbow over east berlin plattenbau apartments (Default)
From: [personal profile] j00j
*hugs* if you would like them, and I hope you're feeling better soon. It was great to panel with you!

Ughh, black mold. Ugh. Wish it were easier to get rid of.

Date: 2013-05-31 12:35 am (UTC)
black_hound: (Rain)
From: [personal profile] black_hound
I'm so very sorry you are suffering. But I am so very glad you have such a wonderful wife (as if I didn't know that already) and a wonderful family to support you and that you made it home.

Breathe easy.

*soft hug*

Date: 2013-05-31 12:43 am (UTC)
dira: Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier (Default)
From: [personal profile] dira
*hugs you both forever and ever*

OMG your lungs! o.O

Date: 2013-05-31 02:00 am (UTC)
iulia: (fixit Aeryn)
From: [personal profile] iulia
*careful hugs*

So glad that you made it home, and here's hoping that your lungs calm down right quick now that they are breathing in familiar air.

Your Cat is Best Cat, clearly. <3

Date: 2013-05-31 02:23 am (UTC)
thnidu: my familiar. "Beanie Baby" -type dragon, red with white wings (Default)
From: [personal profile] thnidu
Um. Mask? Um. But not 24hr/day. :-( Um.

Date: 2013-05-31 02:32 am (UTC)
sexy_romulan: (Default)
From: [personal profile] sexy_romulan
Sweet merciful crap! Glad you're...um, sounds like "okay" may be too strong a word yet, but glad you got through it. Hugs and good vibes to the whole House.

Date: 2013-05-31 02:48 am (UTC)
amorettea: Col. Brandon (Default)
From: [personal profile] amorettea
Spring is never a good time for those of us whose lungs feel doing their job is optional. I am usually at my best in the dead of winter--which is very dry in eastern Montana--as long as no one is using wood heat in my immediate area. I don't know if Wisconsin ever gets dry but you might consider midwinter.

Or haunting the place after it kills you.

Good luck. Now breath in. . .and out. . .

Date: 2013-05-31 03:12 am (UTC)
silsbee: (Default)
From: [personal profile] silsbee
How scary and awful. :(
I hope you feel better very soon. As someone who's been hospitalized for asthma-related problems, I can empathize. *big hugs*

Thanks Cat, for being a superhero! :)

xoxo

Date: 2013-05-31 03:19 am (UTC)
kalmn: (Default)
From: [personal profile] kalmn
should you need to do so in the future, wiscon is very good about even short notice needing to cancel and not come. memberships can be rolled over, i think two hotel rooms got transferred on thursday of the con (although earlier is less nerve wracking), and i will personally organize the party in the bar where we drunk dial you.

Date: 2013-05-31 03:39 am (UTC)
random: (Default)
From: [personal profile] random
I think that every Wiscon, whether or not she is there, should be required to have at least one party in the bar where people drunk dial her. It can become a tradition.

(no subject)

From: [personal profile] kalmn - Date: 2013-05-31 04:29 am (UTC) - Expand

Date: 2013-05-31 04:01 am (UTC)
mercurybard: How many miles to Babylon? (Default)
From: [personal profile] mercurybard
I'm glad you are home and continuing to breathe

Date: 2013-05-31 04:08 am (UTC)
staranise: A star anise floating in a cup of mint tea (Default)
From: [personal profile] staranise
Well that was silly of your lungs. I'm glad you have such awesome people to help you out.

Date: 2013-05-31 04:40 am (UTC)
kiezh: Sam Gamgee, with text "I will not say the day is done" (sam gamgee will not say the day is done)
From: [personal profile] kiezh
Good job with the still breathing! Sucks when that becomes a major challenge. :(

Sending positive thoughts in your direction.

Date: 2013-05-31 07:14 am (UTC)
legionseagle: (Default)
From: [personal profile] legionseagle
That sounds awful - my best wishes for a speedy recovery and, indeed, massive salutations to Cat.

Date: 2013-05-31 07:16 am (UTC)
From: [personal profile] malka
I'm so sorry. I've only experienced lung awfulness at non-emergency levels, but even that was truly awful. And it's not like you can just stop breathing for a few days and give your lungs a rest, either.

Cat sounds like a wonderful person to have on one's side.

Date: 2013-05-31 09:50 am (UTC)
eleanorjane: The one, the only, Harley Quinn. (Default)
From: [personal profile] eleanorjane
Scary stuff! I'm very glad you had support and love when you needed it most, and I hope your recovery is swift.

Date: 2013-05-31 01:47 pm (UTC)
doolabug: (Default)
From: [personal profile] doolabug
All the hugs to you and all the props to Cat!!
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