I wrote a thing

[commodorified]

for BadBang4, because I was foolish enough to browse the requests and got hooked.

The glorious brownbetty egged me on, tossed in numerous valuable bits of Canadian History to abuse, and provided the fantastic¹ fanart.

Does what it says on the (rusted, lead-lined) tin. You have been warned. We will not cover your therapy.

KEEPIN' IT RIEL - A STORY OF LOVE, POLITICS AND HOCKEY IN THREE <strike>PERIODS</strike> ACTS (5111 words) by Betty, MarnaNightingale
Chapters: 1/1

Fandom: Canadian Historical RPF, Canadian History RPF

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Other Warnings May Apply

Relationships: John A MacDonald/Louis Riel, John A MacDonald/Thomas D'arcy McGee, John A MacDonald/Thomas D'Arcy McGee/Louis Riel, Lower Canada/Upper Canada, Thomas D'Arcy McGee/Third Rebel

Characters: The Right Honourable Sir John A. McDonald, Thomas D'Arcy McGee, Louis Riel, Two Royal Canadian Mounted Police, Two Northwest Mounted Police, A Busboy, William Lyon MacKenzie King's Dog, A Pigeon, Six Quebecois Rebels, Ghost of Louis-Joseph Papineau, The Honourable George Brown, James Cockburn, General Sir William Dillon Otter, Ghost of the Mother of William Lyon MacKenzie King (A Referee), Divers Fenians, An Innkeeper (probably also a rebel), An Innkeeper's Boy (will grow up to be a hockey-playing rebel), Unoriginal Male Characters

Additional Tags: Deliberately Bad Fic, Bad Bang, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, scotch jokes, jokes in French, Scots jokes, french jokes, Irish jokes, Hockey, Bad Research, bad chronology, bad characterisation, bad politics, Bad Romance, Upper Canadian concrete and glass, Manitoba Schools Act, Prime Ministers Hiding In Cupboards, Bill 101, self-debauching pigeons, self-debauching politicians, honourable members, right honourable members, Ghosts, Riel talk, Riel trouble, the French are revolting, The Fenians are revolting, the Metis are revolting, insensitive references to Sir John Franklin, Arr Metis, Curling, hurling, Lacrosse, Deliberately Bad Fanart, Franglais, Bon Cop Bad Cop references, Who are you calling poutine? - Freeform, Do not ask me about icing, or highsticking, Dammit I forgot to include a yacht race - Freeform, A full pardon for Louis Riel and reparations for the residential schools, Chester Brown should never read this - Freeform, James Mcnamee should never read this - Freeform, but everyone should read James Mcnamee and Chester Brown, The Yankee to the south of us must south of us remain, I feel like there are a lot of holes in this plot., Kate Beaton is a national treasure, Gordon Lightfoot, Stan Rogers, arcade fire, Captain Tractor, Stompin' Tom, DOA - Freeform, you're more likely to be killed by a moose than by a terrorist, remember when men were men pigeons were pigeons and Tories weren't completely evil?, Frenglish, PLZ R & R (read and revolt)

Summary:

The year is 1875, and Louis Riel is exiled for crimes against the government of Canada. The railroad heads west, and Manitoba is finally surveyed and properly blocked off into little boxes for Ottawa.


In the winter of 1876, Sir John A. Macdonald is advised of the shift of public opinion. A passionate series of letters to the newspapers is inciting the Quebecois, lighting a rebellious fire in their eyes. It’s just shy of ninety years since the French revolted in Europe, but it is not far from the minds of the Senate or Legislature when their resident French population’s blood is stirring so patriotically in their veins.


Under duress, Sir John A. Macdonald calls on the one man he knows can make any revolution fail--former MP Louis Riel.


Louis Riel accepts too eagerly, heading straight into Ottawa, and arrives in Macdonald’s office at gunpoint.

1 It actually *is* fantastic fanart; I love her faces a lot.

Comments

[nenya_kanadka]

My God. It's so beautiful.

(When I have more than two braincells to rub together, I'll read the fic too! Have written for Bad Bang a couple of times myself and it's certainly an experience. And the fanart--!)

[commodorified]

The tags were a terrible lot of fun to write.

I don't want to rush you, but I don't think you're going to need the braincells...

[fajrdrako]

I will never think of these historical figures in the same way again.

[deakat]

This is THE most amazing thing. Thank you!!! (I did not know I wanted this until I saw it.)

[deakat]

Coding error in the middle of this paragraph, I do believe:

They KISS, and slowly sink back into the luxurious BED OF FURS which has mysteriously appeared in the night. Acts intended to lead to ENTHUSIASTIC BUGGERY ensue, but are interrupted when COLORFUL TOQUE he has somehow acquired, and strikes an INVITING POSE. It is apparent that at least a younger or perhaps malnourished MOOSE would have some cause for embarrassment.

[commodorified]

Fixed! Thank you!

[aella_irene]

Canadian Housemate says this hurts his soul. We are trying to persuade him to perform a dramatic reading of it for our Canada Day barbecue.

[commodorified]

I NEED YOU TO SEKKRITLY RECORD THIS PLZ.

[aella_irene]

We are trying to drum up a suitable number of Canadians who won't escape.

[sara]

I'm pretty sure I'm still not far enough north to read this story.