A question which just occurred to me

[commodorified]

I am enthusiastically in favour of addressing people as they wish to be addressed, and referring to them by the pronouns, etc, that they prefer, or, if lacking data, using 'they'.

And there has, thankfully, been a lot of discussion of the matter to help me get this right.

So now I am wondering about formal modes of address for general and specific addressing of people whose genders are non-binary.

staranise sensibly points out that when addressing groups, "Honoured Guests" may reasonably be used along with, or instead of, "Ladies and Gentlemen/Mesdames et Messieurs". (ETA anne adds "Amis Distingués")

Suitable substitutes for "Sir", "Madam" "Ma'am", "Mr." "Ms", "M.", "Mmme", and so forth, however, elude me.

Has anyone seen anything good on this?

Comments

[anne]

I don't think there's a default yet, so asking individuals what they prefer still seems like the way to go.

(I'd like to add "ami(e)s distingué(e)s" to go with "honoured guests," BTW. I'm pretty sure I'm not just making it up?)

[commodorified]

I think you are right!

And, I am thinking more of cases where people aren't available to be asked, which as people get more hip to non-binary gender will I assume become more common. And if I'm addressing someone formally, there are high odds that I don't have the kind of access where I have already asked. I might be, for example, mailing invitations to an event, or meeting someone who is much above me in age and accomplishment.

And also of cases where you ARE asking people, but in the form of, for example, check boxes that say Ms/Mr/Miss/Mrs./Dr/Fr/Sr/so forth (subscription forms, government paperwork, etc.) and so need something to offer.